Things I Think *Girls Like

*and also keep in mind that this is tongue-in-cheek joke and being a girl means many things and you can have a dick or be asexual or play videogames *kisses N64 controller gently* or disagree with all of this or be a fucking CHIA PET and still be a girl, okay?

  • the day Pumpkin Spice comes out at Starbucks we kind of go buckwild, don’t we?
  • splitting a very rich, very cheesy dish with a friend at a restaurant
  • dance to a Beyonce song before we all go out for drinks
  • showing a friend a pair of new boots that might match a considerable amount of outfits in our wardrobe
  • going to brunch or dinner and ordering that other drink you weren’t intending on ordering and then you giggle
  • balsamic vinagrette
  • over easy eggs
  • it’s simply the IDEA of leather shorts
  • mascara that keeps its promise
  • lipsyncing a song that is good
  • being excited about a person in great detail
  • conflicting opinions about Kristen Stewart
  • a solid appreciation for lesbians
  • booty shaking in an outfit that delivers
  • trying out your dance skills while pregaming
  • modeling a new coat in the mirror
  • putting lotion on
  • whispering in a low voice about a friend that’s acting weird that’s not even there
  • making plans for a dinner that might not happen
  • coming out in a nice dress after spending 40 minutes choosing that outfit while our friend sit in our living room switching channels on the TV
  • updating somebody on a relationship that has gone wrong in our friend’s life
  • staring at ourselves sideways in the mirror when our makeup looks fly and so does our dress
  • an irrational annoyance for this girl
  • I guess I’ll check Jezebel
  • Please don’t hate your thighs, this isn’t part of the list
  • I could marry my best friend
  • imitating Ursula when she says “but don’t underestimate the power of BODY LANGUAGE” and shaking our tentacles
  • posing in the mirror angrily or sexily
  • having an opinion about arugula
  • figuring out the shape or your lips when you put on lipstick
  • the day we realize our period is over sorry but it’s kind of fucking good
  • or when the Midol kicks in
  • avocado come the FUCK ON
  • when the taste of nail polish remover finally leaves our mouths because we drink it
  • when we stop stealing dogs we see on the street and we get cleared of charges from the cops because we’re *CuTe&*
  • we’re trying on clothing and the shit actually looks good on us
  • when low-fat cheese pours from the sky
  • listening to a song almost 8000 times on repeat we don’t finish it we just start over
  • talking about how we might not like Anne Hathaway or Taylor Swift BECAUSE (and we are all wrong and entitled to our own opinion they are humans)
  • I’m drunk and dancing to Azaleia Banks 212 I guess I just dance by myself ALL THE TIME
  • not judging a girl on how many girls she sleeps with this is a side note DONT BE AN ASSHOLE
  • watching Sex and The City and explaining why we would never ever be a fucking Carrie 
  • enjoying sex you idiots
  • having a usable hairband on one’s wrist
  • finding a good decoration for the bedroom, like a poster that is enjoyable
  • body spray or candles that might represent the lavender scent
  • wondering how Jon Hamm would feel about us
  • staring at our new nail color
  • getting seconds at holiday dinner
  • appreciating the color PLUM
  • enjoying looking good in a solid denim jacket 
  • or an appropriate gold eyeshadow
  • complimenting our friends when they feel bad cuz they are hot and too fucking stupid to realize it
  • appreciating a good opportunity for a Facebook Profile Pic
  • drinking things with motherfucking straws
  • vampires! hot vampires!
  • the idea of veggie burgers whether carnivorous or not or sometimes people just like eating goat cheese or beets
  • HBO shows
  • the idea of kale in things
  • or crepes, maybe we can all get crepes with walnuts
  • wouldn’t you like to see my handwriting? I have practiced my handwriting
  • sharing a youtube video of a song or a cat playing with something 
  • making a meal together, it’s so nice, I have spaghetti
  • here’s a nice sweater, this comfortable sweater I look good in
  • eye makeup remover that WORKS
  • putting on a pair of sweatpants or pajama pants that have some goddamn snowman theme
  • running their hands up and down their legs after one finally shaves them
  • thinking about a text they might send for a while and discussing it with people
  • nice wine glasses
  • candles with a certain “vanilla” scent
  • body scrub really makes me go nuts, seriously, expensive shampoo makes me squirt
  • a celebrity that I find hot and makes jokes on Twitter and I will explode
  • spraying perfume like willy nilly
  • guiltily having an opinion about The Real Housewives of Something County
  • doing eyeliner right for goddamn once
  • appetizers/getting two appetizers as dinner
  • hot pink tank tops and tan skin, unfortunately the color scheme looks pleasurable 
  • hair scrunching
  • not giving a fuck
  • being annoyed at our hair and our skin
  • people who understand feminist isn’t a fucking bad word
  • waking up and not having to shower because you don’t look like bull shit
  • Mean Girls COME ON
  • I like so many things I’ll continue this list later maybe TACO BELL? 
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  19. amandaandinteriors reblogged this from ofvaticancameos and added:
    There are bad words and a few promiscuous things I don’t agree with, but this is pretty spot on. And a jolly good laugh.
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